MDR (mort de rire): Death of Laughter

NUMBER 1
::FUSAC: Created in 1988 FUSAC (France USA Contacts) is a free magazine containing classified ads and advertisements for the English-speaking community (Americans, British, Canadians, Irish, Australians, New Zealanders, etc.) of Paris and the surrounding area.

Today I finally looked at the FUSAC that has been sitting on my coffee table for the last week. Apparently I haven't read it close enough because it is FULL of interesting content. I would even compare it to some American tabloids. There are things that make you say "huh?".

Under the heading of FRIENDSHIP
"Nice looking, tall, sweet, refined, generous, sincere, patient, international Parisian 48y looks for Asian Lady for magic quality relationship."

"A business man in apparel, 43 y/o looks 35. Hard working, serious, funny. Seeks a girl not more than 30, American/European/Japanese origin, with good family & life background for cultural exchange. Later if things are ok willing to marry & have children, to mix culture & civilization between each society."

NUMBER 2
::Blind Leading the Blind
Two English cliches were fulfilled this week. I was going up the stairs at the Duroc metro and could not get past these two men holding onto each other. I was quite frustrated as to what the hold-up could be. Once I finally passed them, I looked back and noticed they were both blind.
::No Use Crying Over Spilled Milk
Thursday morning I was in the family kitchen making Zac's lunch while he was finishing his breakfast. He tried to pour the milk himself and spilled it all over the place. Since this was the third time he did it this week, he knew I was going to be upset. I have told him repeatedly to ask me for help. He cried. I told him that he can't expect to pour a big jug of milk with those mashed potatoes, not strong muscles, in his arms. He laughed.

NUMBER 3
::Jealous?
Tonight I was talking to Barth while he was on the computer and Zac was sitting in my lap. I was hugging him and said "Barth is sooo jealous that he didn't have me as his nanny when he was your age. He never had someone's lap to sit in or for her to tickle him give him kisses on the forehead." Zac responded with "I am jealous too!" I asked why he was jealous. He said "Because I have you!" I was confused and so was Barth. He asked, "Zac, do you even know what jealous means?" Zac says, "No."

NUMBER 4
::Soup du Jour
Last night I wanted to make a meal with the leftover chicken from the day before. I wrote my mom to see how I could make the soup that we always ate the day after Thanksgiving because it's so good. I had already thrown out all the bones so I really couldn't do chicken stock, but I was determined to make it delicious anyway. I boiled some water, milk, and creme fraiche with a couple boullion cubes and chopped onion. Then I added potatoes, rice, corn, and carrots, as well as the chicken. After an hour and a half of it stewing, it was ready. I tasted it and almost slipped off into a sweet day dream of fairies and flowers of the fields. It was so amazing. I served it up for the boys and they all looked disturbed. They kept stirring it and lifting up their spoon and tipping it to pour the soup back into the bowl. Zac said "Connie, I cannot. I cannot eat this!" I got a little perturbed. Barth listed off each thing in it and asked Zac if he liked those ingredients. He said he did. Then he tried it and said "Ah, c'est bon!" However, Balth, the real chef of the family, or rather my assistant and critic, said "Connie, this is very bizarre. It's like a main course in liquid." I have no idea if he enjoyed the meal or not. Instead of more ridicule, I put the rest of the soup in containers and brought it back to my flat so I can eat it for a week.